The Second Time Around


Becoming pregnant for the second time was just as exciting as the first time. I expected that everything would be just the same as my first experience of motherhood. However, I was surprised to find that although some things were the same, other aspects of being a parent were easier and others were harder.

Things That Are Easier Second Time Around

By the time you have your second baby you already have experience of caring for a new baby. You feel better prepared and know what to expect. It is much easier because you are not having to learn how to do each task from scratch. Another reason it is easier is that you worry less and feel more relaxed. With my first, I worried about all the different types of crying, every time my baby was sick I worried they were ill and if they held their breath when they were sleeping I completely panicked. Second time around I know all the little scary things that babies do and know that they are not really scary. I also knew more tips and tricks to cope with the difficult parts of parenting second time around, such as different ways to get a restless baby to sleep.

Things That Are Harder Second Time Around

The biggest difference I found with my second baby was that I had less time to rest or just sit nursing my newborn. With my first I could devote all my time to the baby and take naps whenever they did. When I had my second baby I had the additional responsibility of a toddler to care for. While my baby slept I would be feeding my toddler or trying to spend time with them so they would not become jealous of the new baby and feel like their mum was giving all her attention to someone new. This was particularly hard in the first week because I was still sore from giving birth. With a second baby people sometimes assume that you will need less support because you already have some experience of being a parent. The reverse is actually true because you now have double the responsibilities.

Things That Are Exactly the Same

I was worried when I was pregnant that I couldn’t possibly love another child as much as I loved my first-born child. I am happy to say that I felt the exact same surge of love when I was handed my second baby and an instant bond, just as I had with my first. The same feelings of love have continued for both children. The duties you have to do as a mum are also the same with your second baby. I found that I had a very similar routine of feeding, changing nappies, cuddling and trying to get the baby to sleep. These are the type of activities that are uniform whether it is you first, your second or even your sixth baby.